More Than “Just†a Footnote
A year after gunmen attacked his car, killing his young driver, I mourn the loss of Mustafa
Mustafa – associate, companion, employee, friend
It has been a year since I lost a close associate, an employee, a friend. After I miraculously escaped a carefully planned dénouement, there was much to celebrate: the chance to live, the experience of having defied death. But this living has come with a death at its very centre. Young Mustafa, who had still to experience life, was deprived of that. What can it be called? An accident? An assassination? Crossfire? Or the sheer randomness of death?
In 2008, on returning to Pakistan after a stint with the Asian Development Bank, I hired Mustafa. Another candidate, who could not work full-time, referred him to me. I was a little hesitant to hire someone so young but during the various tests, he proved to be a responsible driver and immediately endeared himself to my family, including my young children, who later became his friends.
He shared my enthusiasm for old buildings, random signs, rickshaw posters and pop art
Mustafa, a resident of Kasur, was the eldest child of a landless, working-class family. They had to stock wheat after every harvest, lived in a house that sustained damage after every monsoon, and faced the brutal marginalization of being who they were in the essentially classist rural society of Punjab. Mustafa’s venturing out to the city, therefore, added a bit of pride in addition to financial support for the family. He was choosing not to be a manual labourer, but opting instead for better-paid “highâ€-skill-based employment. I found out about all these nuances as we spoke about his village and the dynamics therein.
Within a year of working for us, Mustafa’s ailing father, paralysed after an accident, passed away. This made him even more worried about his family and the frequency of his visits to the village increased. His mother was next: after a year or so, she too died. Here was a twenty-something responsible for the household and his young siblings. Before she passed away, his mother had arranged his marriage to a distant cousin. It was a marriage of his choice as well: he had known his young wife-to-be since childhood.
As part of Pakistan’s new, well-connected youth, Mustafa had a rather adept relationship with technology. He would deftly use Pakistan’s low-cost telecom service provider, Zong, and its various packages to conduct long conversations with his family, friends, village wallas and fiancé. To enhance his “talk time†– or “minutes†as they are known colloquially – he kept two mobile phones on him and when the limit on one SIM card had been exhausted, the other “package†was activated. I had to chide him on occasion as the earphones had become a permanent fixture of his persona. He would laugh and remove them.
His engagement with social media also came as an extension of his discovery of mobile telephony. Mustafa was a school dropout and, despite my repeated reminders, did not seem interested in pursuing further education. This was in contrast to another domestic helper who had agreed to study and will soon graduate with an arts degree. But Facebook came as a little wonder into Mustafa’s life, opening doors to global news mostly picked up through videos, memes and images. Often, he knew more about what was happening in Gaza or Iraq. A Bollywood fan, he even knew what its artists were up to and which films had been released with what storyline.
Mustafa also began to follow many sermons by popular clerics in Pakistan. There were discussions on the faith as well. But throughout, Mustafa’s adherence to the Sufi variant of Islamic faith remained steadfast despite the questions he picked up from the more puritanical versions, ironically via technological communication.
His village dargah of a local saint and Kasur’s famous shrine of Bulleh Shah were the two centres at which annual rituals were performed and I too contributed to the ceremonies. There was a rock-solid belief in peaceful, non-violent ideas that the Sufi legacy continues to inspire among so many people in Pakistan. It is not a coincidence that those who consider Sufi shrines spaces for infidels (and their ilk actually bomb them) reportedly killed him. Mustafa, too, albeit indirectly, was a victim of that ideology.
As his status grew in the village with the regular income he received, unlike the daily wages that are the norm for many informal workers in Pakistan, so did his quest to acquire a weapon for “safetyâ€. The government has banned the issuance of arms licenses and exceptions – quite a few – are made when you have a strong recommendation from an elected representative or member of the bureaucracy. For months, he had wanted me to get him a license for a prohibited bore. I am anti-gun in theory and always wary of the idea of a gun traveling in the same car as me. Events have given me a reality check.
So when I moved to Express TV and there were increasing threats to the channel, I sought the help of a security guard who was also with us on that fateful day of Mustafa’s murder and my near-death experience. The Express Group was getting a deal from the Punjab Police whereby licenses were to be issued for security. I was finally going to get close to fulfilling Mustafa’s wish, but the opportunity never came. Before it materialized, he was gone.
All these years, Mustafa was not an ordinary employee. He was more than a family member, a playmate of my children, an administrative associate who helped me negotiate two cities, two homes, multiple careers and travels. He knew where my papers were and where my bills, forms and the entire daily grind was located. He was an ever-smiling, gentle shadow over my logistical existence. More than that, he was emotionally supportive in his own way. If I had yelled on the phone, he would bring me a glass of water. If I had not gone for my daily walk, he would remind me to. He would buy me snacks – corn on the cob, bananas, jamuns and yogurt – between multiple appointments so that I could eat. So we were friends – as far as the hierarchy could allow. I trusted him more than many I knew.
He was also my companion when I visited Sufi shrines as a regular feature of my Lahore life. Even on the night of 28 March 2014, we had planned a trip to Data Darbar. It was a special Friday night and it was he who had reminded me that day. He had, despite my protests, displayed a poster of the saints on the back window of the car. He shared my enthusiasm for discovering old buildings, for random signs, rickshaw posters and other forms of pop art. He would slow down and ask me to take a picture of an outlandish advert or a painting on a truck.
But he was taken away. A part of me, too, has died. I live with a haunting, gnawing hole in my being. There is not a day that his face does not appear while I am awake or asleep. Perhaps I am suffering from trauma. But this is accentuated by my being away from home, being afraid to risk another tragedy. More than my mortality, I am now obsessed with the idea that someone else might get hurt or even receive a minor injury on my account. I am on the radar of the militants and their handlers and this is a reality that I have to live with for some time. Why I threw conformity to the winds and whether it was all it is worth, is something I need to figure out.
Before I left Pakistan, I tried in my humble way to organize some financial support for Mustafa’s family. This too had its own dynamics and left me disillusioned once again with the darkest recesses of human behaviour. After I had left, the police arrested the alleged gunmen and Mustafa’s family had to undergo another ordeal: threats, pressure, and inducements. We remained in touch but I let them decide what they deemed best. I could neither insist on them giving false evidence, nor stop them, for the entire system of justice is the stuff of Greek tragedies.
And the most recent jolt. Mustafa’s younger brother was arrested last week by the police as a “suspect†in a local case of dacoity. They took him to the police station and tortured him for a night. A police official who lives in the area had apparently decided to teach them a lesson for not acting like the landless peasants they are. My family intervened to have him released and now another friend, a human rights lawyer, is working on his case. For the poor of our country, there is simply no protection. The torture has left Mustafa’s brother maimed. Medical care is poor in Kasur and so another transaction, another layer of exploitation – healthcare – has been added to the miseries of the family. I am a remote participant, sometimes effective and at other times not so useful. This is how it is.
A new report states that Pakistan has lost 80,000 people during the ongoing war on terrorism. Mustafa is a mere footnote in this sordid saga. I could have been a digit too. Human life and dignity, those meaningless, abstract terms one had learned, stand mocked and hung upside down where injustice prevails.
Thousands of Mustafas remain vulnerable at the hands of this extremist mind-set unless the state cuts the umbilical cord that gives the killers their strength, their impunity
A military court may actually hear this case now. The gunmen are in jail, but the mastermind, according to police reports as cited in the media, is in Dubai. He has a leader who heads a large, overwhelming militia. The militia was set up in the 1980s by the most powerful elements of the state. The task is an uphill one. The masked gunmen who fired at my car and killed Mustafa are unrecognizable. If the ones in jail are hanged, will this be justice? Perhaps in that vengeful moment or in a limited sense. But thousands of Mustafas remain vulnerable at the hands of the same mind-set unless the state cuts the umbilical cord that gives the killers their strength, their impunity.
In the meantime, I mourn Mustafa, celebrate his short, beautiful life, and pray that his family remains safe. I also pray that I might get over the image of his dead body as I tried to pull him out from the bullet-riddled car amid a melee unwilling to help.
One day, all this will change, I hope. But nothing will bring Mustafa back.
Dear Raza,
It was a beautiful read. I felt sorry for Mustafa’s family and the ordeal they have to go through even now.
I am glad that you helped them in whatever way it was possible and you still are helping them.
May this country get out of the menace it created over decades.
But i don’t understand why some people wanted to kill you? Are you a Shia or a very vocal liberal?
Regards
I just want to say I am very new to blogging and site-building and definitely loved this web page. Most likely I’m want to bookmark your blog . You surely have incredible articles. Kudos for sharing with us your web page.
I am not afraid to find this but this is just insane.
Hello there! I know this is somewhat off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this website? I’m getting fed up of WordPress because I’ve had issues with hackers and I’m looking at options for another platform. I would be fantastic if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.|
Kurye olarak hizmet veren kişiler, bulundukları lokasyondaki her adrese en kısa sürede ulaşma yolunu bilirler. Üstelik verilen bu görevi hava, trafik ve buna benzer diğer olumsuz şartlardan etkilenmeden yerine getirirler. Yani iş hayatı başta olmak üzere hayatın hemen her alanında önemli görevleri üstlenebilir ve başarıyla yerine getirebilirler. Özellikle büyük şehirlerdeki trafik kaosu ve adres konusundaki karmaşa göze alınırsa, kurye hizmetlerinden faydalanmanın bazı durumlarda zorunlu hale geleceği anlaşılabilir. Örneğin İstanbul’un bir noktasından diğer bir noktasına acil şekilde önemli bir evrak ulaştırmak gerektiğinde ya da hastanızın ihtiyacı olan ilacı acil ve güvenli bir şekilde ulaştırmak gerektiğinde, İstanbul moto kurye hizmetimizden faydalanarak sorununuza çözüm üretebilirsiniz.
Attractive element of content. I simply stumbled upon your blog and in accession capital to claim that I get actually loved account your blog posts. Anyway I will be subscribing to your feeds and even I fulfillment you get admission to persistently quickly.|
Wow, incredible blog format! How long have you been blogging for? you made blogging glance easy. The total look of your site is fantastic, let alone the content!
Spot on with this write-up, I honestly believe that this web site needs much more attention. I’ll probably be back again to read more, thanks for the information!|
Very nice post. I definitely appreciate this site. Thanks!|
Good information. Lucky me I came across your website by accident (stumbleupon). I’ve saved as a favorite for later!|
Great write-up, I am regular visitor of one’s web site, maintain up the nice operate, and It’s going to be a regular visitor for a lengthy time.
I gotta bookmark this internet site it seems very beneficial extremely helpful
My spouse and I absolutely love your blog and find nearly all of your post’s to be just
what I’m looking for. Does one offer guest writers to write
content for you personally? I wouldn’t mind creating a post or elaborating
on some of the subjects you write regarding here. Again, awesome web log!
F*ckin’ tremendous issues here. I am very happy to peer your post. Thanks a lot and i am taking a look ahead to contact you. Will you kindly drop me a mail?
I view something genuinely interesting about your web site so I saved to bookmarks .
Absolutely written articles , thankyou for information .
I dugg some of you post as I cogitated they were very beneficial extremely helpful
I got what you mean , appreciate it for putting up.Woh I am lucky to find this website through google. “The test and use of a man’s education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind.” by Carl Barzun.
You have observed very interesting details! ps nice internet site.
I think this is one of the most significant info for me. And i am glad reading your article. But wanna remark on some general things, The site style is perfect, the articles is really great : D. Good job, cheers
Hello, Neat post. There’s a problem together with your site in web explorer, may check this… IE nonetheless is the market chief and a big section of other folks will omit your wonderful writing due to this problem.
You could certainly see your enthusiasm within the paintings you write. The sector hopes for even more passionate writers like you who are not afraid to mention how they believe. At all times go after your heart. “What power has law where only money rules.” by Gaius Petronius.
Excellent read, I just passed this onto a friend who was doing some research on that. And he actually bought me lunch as I found it for him smile Thus let me rephrase that: Thanks for lunch! “Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.” by Sir Arthur Eddington.
I am really impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one today..
I like this web blog so much, saved to bookmarks. “I don’t care what is written about me so long as it isn’t true.” by Dorothy Parker.
I conceive you have remarked some very interesting points , thankyou for the post.
A person necessarily help to make seriously articles I might state. This is the first time I frequented your website page and to this point? I amazed with the analysis you made to create this particular publish incredible. Excellent activity!
naturally like your web-site but you have to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling issues and I find it very troublesome to inform the reality nevertheless I’ll surely come again again.
I’m not sure where you are getting your information, but great topic. I needs to spend some time learning more or understanding more. Thanks for great information I was looking for this information for my mission.
I’ve recently started a blog, the information you provide on this site has helped me tremendously. Thank you for all of your time & work. “A physicist is an atom’s way of knowing about atoms.” by George Wald.
You could certainly see your expertise in the paintings you write. The sector hopes for more passionate writers such as you who aren’t afraid to mention how they believe. All the time go after your heart. “What power has law where only money rules.” by Gaius Petronius.
F*ckin’ tremendous things here. I am very glad to see your post. Thanks a lot and i’m having a look ahead to touch you. Will you kindly drop me a mail?
A lot of thanks for all your efforts on this website. My mom enjoys managing internet research and it’s easy to understand why. All of us know all of the compelling mode you present both interesting and useful guidelines on this web blog and therefore inspire response from website visitors on that theme so our favorite simple princess has been starting to learn a great deal. Take pleasure in the remaining portion of the new year. You’re carrying out a glorious job.
Definitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to be on the web the easiest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while people think about worries that they just don’t know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and also defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people can take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks
I really appreciate this post. I’ve been looking all over for this! Thank goodness I found it on Bing. You have made my day! Thank you again!
I simply could not depart your web site prior to suggesting that I really loved the usual information a person supply on your visitors? Is going to be again continuously to check up on new posts.
Great write-up, I’m regular visitor of one’s site, maintain up the excellent operate, and It’s going to be a regular visitor for a long time.
Thanks a lot for giving everyone an extremely pleasant possiblity to read articles and blog posts from this web site. It’s always so amazing and as well , full of a lot of fun for me and my office colleagues to search the blog at least thrice per week to study the newest things you have got. And of course, we’re actually impressed with your mind-blowing tips you give. Certain 3 tips in this post are undoubtedly the most efficient we have all ever had.
You can certainly see your expertise in the paintings you write. The sector hopes for more passionate writers such as you who aren’t afraid to mention how they believe. All the time follow your heart. “The most profound joy has more of gravity than of gaiety in it.” by Michel de Montaigne.
Magnificent goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you are just too excellent. I really like what you have acquired here, really like what you are saying and the way in which you say it. You make it enjoyable and you still take care of to keep it sensible. I cant wait to read much more from you. This is really a terrific website.
I’ve been browsing online more than 3 hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours. It is pretty worth enough for me. In my opinion, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content as you did, the web will be much more useful than ever before.
Very interesting subject, thanks for posting.
I gotta favorite this website it seems very helpful very helpful
You are my inspiration , I have few blogs and rarely run out from to brand.I believe this internet site contains some rattling great info for everyone. “Drunkenness is temporary suicide.” by Bertrand Russell.
I went over this website and I believe you have a lot of fantastic information, saved to my bookmarks (:.
Magnificent web site. Plenty of helpful information here. I’m sending it to a few buddies ans additionally sharing in delicious. And naturally, thank you in your sweat!
I got what you mean , thanks for putting up.Woh I am lucky to find this website through google. “Money is the most egalitarian force in society. It confers power on whoever holds it.” by Roger Starr.
Some really prime blog posts on this web site , saved to fav.
I like what you guys are up also. Such intelligent work and reporting! Keep up the superb works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it’ll improve the value of my site :).
Usually I don’t read article on blogs, but I would like to say that this write-up very pressured me to try and do it! Your writing taste has been amazed me. Thank you, quite great post.
Thanks for sharing excellent informations. Your web site is very cool. I’m impressed by the details that you have on this web site. It reveals how nicely you perceive this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the information I already searched everywhere and just couldn’t come across. What a perfect web-site.
Fantastic goods from you, man. I have understand your stuff previous to and you are just extremely excellent. I actually like what you have acquired here, certainly like what you are saying and the way in which you say it. You make it entertaining and you still care for to keep it sensible. I can not wait to read far more from you. This is actually a wonderful web site.
I like this weblog very much, Its a very nice spot to read and obtain information. “Never contend with a man who has nothing to lose.” by Baltasar Gracian.
Wow, awesome blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you make blogging look easy. The overall look of your site is excellent, as well as the content!
We’re a gaggle of volunteers and starting a brand new scheme in our community. Your website offered us with useful info to paintings on. You have done a formidable activity and our entire community shall be grateful to you.
I was studying some of your articles on this internet site and I believe this web site is real informative ! Continue posting .
Very interesting topic , thankyou for posting . “Not by age but by capacity is wisdom acquired.” by Titus Maccius Plautus.
I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was good. I don’t know who you are but definitely you’re going to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
Somebody essentially assist to make seriously articles I would state. This is the first time I frequented your website page and thus far? I amazed with the research you made to create this actual post amazing. Fantastic activity!
Thanks for sharing excellent informations. Your site is very cool. I am impressed by the details that you have on this site. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found simply the info I already searched everywhere and just couldn’t come across. What a great web-site.
I really like your writing style, great info , regards for putting up : D.
Hey would you mind sharing which blog platform you’re using? I’m looking to start my own blog in the near future but I’m having a tough time deciding between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your design seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something unique. P.S My apologies for getting off-topic but I had to ask!
I really appreciate this post. I’ve been looking all over for this! Thank goodness I found it on Bing. You have made my day! Thank you again!
My brother recommended I might like this website. He was totally right. This post truly made my day. You can not imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!
I have learn some excellent stuff here. Certainly price bookmarking for revisiting. I wonder how a lot attempt you place to create the sort of great informative web site.
Hey, you used to write magnificent, but the last few posts have been kinda boring… I miss your super writings. Past several posts are just a little out of track! come on!
Merely a smiling visitant here to share the love (:, btw great layout. “He profits most who serves best.” by Arthur F. Sheldon.
Good – I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your website. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs and related info ended up being truly simple to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, web site theme . a tones way for your customer to communicate. Nice task.
My developer is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on various websites for about a year and am worried about switching to another platform. I have heard very good things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress content into it? Any help would be really appreciated!
Hello, you used to write excellent, but the last several posts have been kinda boring… I miss your super writings. Past few posts are just a bit out of track! come on!
Fantastic goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you’re just extremely wonderful. I really like what you have acquired here, really like what you are stating and the way in which you say it. You make it enjoyable and you still take care of to keep it sensible. I can’t wait to read far more from you. This is really a wonderful site.